Friday, March 23, 2012

The Leafs are green.... and on the way up (hm, how about that hockey...)

Well not really, they're blue and they are falling*... They have broken my heart yet another season. They are falling and fast decending in thier conference. I can not even say I'll be surprised if they fall to the last plae and kick Canadiens out of there (even if they've been there solid for a long time).

What Is making me happy though, is not my other teams that I cheat with (only two, Canucks and the Sweidsh team Red Wings) but this table that I'm posting here. These are the Swedes in the NHL. A whopping 48 of them (remember, there are only like 9 million in total so it's pretty good in my book). And the best one right now? Is a 21 year old who is looking very impressive and will hopefully have an awesome time and career, Erik Karlsson. Living and playing in Ottawa, which I guess is partly why my Leafs are worse for wear since they share the division. Then again, I'm a sucker for Canada when it comes to the play offs. And I've been told I'm a bit of a mushy one for "teams that haven't been good for a while to make it to the play offs" - Although, that's pretty obvious since I love the Leafs... and they haven't been there in a while. And right now, Vancouver is looking fairly alone in the Canada vs US game, unless Winnipeg Jets (another one of these 'new/old' teams) makes it, still hope there!

So, Ottawa might make it - I need to step it up and watch those games. St Louis ! is making it to the play offs too, and in the lead in their conference, ahead of Vancouver and Detroit... all in all, I guess I'm happy as long as:
  • Ducks don't make an apperance (not looking likely)
  • if Leafs not end up dead last in their conference (jury's out on that right now)
  • Blackhawks get a 'little' penalty for an elbow in the face of someone who wasn't even close to the puck (I'm looking at you Kevin!), especially since it looked like concussion....
  • I get to sleep this weekend and not see work even a smidge! And get to work out a little of the frustrations... it's been a long month so far....
Here is the table; for all the fellow geeks :)

*the Toronto Maple Leafs - NHL - sports - hockey!!!

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

If you have nothing good to say...

...just stay quiet.

If you aren't sure you can keep the resentment and sarcasm away from a so called work conversation; just stay quiet.

If you realise that people talking aren't really looking for a solution, but someone to blame; just stay quiet.

If you feel a little abandoned in the mines of "endless slugging around"; just dig in and keep quiet.

But when someone tells you "it will all be ok in the end, sweetheart"; don't be quiet, smile and say "thank you sweetie". Because really, the rest is just smoke and fog to what really matters.

(I'm having a tempted time of going to the place where I don't want to go, i.e. "not caring as much" but since this would mean I'm not really doing as good of a job I need to find a happy medium of "working enough" and "sleeping through the night and not staying up tossing and turning until 3 am thinking about work and what needs to be done and protecting yourself etc etc etc". Now go and read Monday madness if you haven't, that might make a better Tuesday Tiresome story?

UPDATE: I think this article really shows how complicated things are and that indeed these laws being passed all over the US are more than "just unfortenate" or "to protect the unborn children"... )

Monday, March 19, 2012

Monday madness

I guess I can get happy to be stracted from reading the news since I'm running around like a dog trying to catch its tail. However, some news still trickle into my brain when I'm eating lunch and trying to take a shorter break. Oh how I wish I hadn't.

{feministic spin with links to some of the suggestions last week. You know, we're in a recession - people don't have jobs, US is involved in several wars, the budget isn't balanced, middleclass people can't afford sending their children to university: well to be fair; the universities have trouble keeping up with the bills and teaching - but don't worry, we'll keep the debate where it needs to be; remove women's rights and ban homosexuals. *head desk* }

From HuffPo: "The Life Defense Act of 2012, sponsored by state Rep. Matthew Hill (R-Jonesborough), mandates that the Tennessee Department of Health make detailed demographic information about every woman who has an abortion available to the public, including her age, race, county, marital status, education level, number of children, the location of the procedure and how many times she has been pregnant. Each report would also have to include the name of the doctor who performed the procedure." They do acknowledge that it might lead to dangers for both the doctor (abortion provider) as well as the woman, but I'm not so sure they really think it is a bad idea to be in danger. After all, it's a sin, you're immoral and you know "if you really cared about it you would just stop with your errenous ways".

It's not as good as the gem from last week from Georgia, in which I as a woman am compared to a cow and/or pig and therefore I should have to keep my stillborn inside of me until it decides to come out 'naturally' ... it's certainly not that far away. (It's a video from the floor of the house when the bill is discussed... so I'm not making this up.)

Oh, and if you've missed this gem too - in Arizona - ("you can only used contraceptives for medical reasons") where a coorperation are people. However I'm starting to doubt women are people? (Although, it is worth noting thar former president candidate McCain is opposing the latter one, even if he is a staunch republican.... and from Arizona...)

Someone who seems pretty upset too: Over here

Well, let's see... I think that pretty much sums it up. I am even less sure on why I ended up in this place of the world but... well, maybe there is hope for the future? If only people could tell these presidential candidates that running for most extreme isn't going to make things better for the country. Although, I guess the [word escapes me at the moment but if anyone knows what I refer to I'd be happy] 'index' might be what they're aiming for. After proposing that we should limit rights to a minimum, everything else seems agreeable??

Monday, March 12, 2012

it's not a "woman/women issue only" (and some sports)

Reading for a Monday - before the basketball craze* starts tomorrow.

Here's a link to an article I read this morning: Where the boys aren't . Never mind if it is eloquently written or not but it's one of the few articles I've read where there are some men who make a comment that "women's right to birth control and/or health screenings is not only about the women". right. Mind shattering.

(Well, after reading that more than half of ppl in two states here in the South think that the president isn't a Christian I don't know. Maybe ppl are just way way way more clueless that my little positive me thinks?!)

*after looking at the hockey stats right now, I'm thinking that maybe March will end better if I focus on that college March Madness basketball tournament since the Leafs are not going to the play offs, Red Wings are moving downwards and St Louis Blues are in a solid lead in the West... what?!?!!? Now, only to decide which teams to pick, I've been parcial to the names Gonzaga and Belmont before so... any suggestions rfom US based (or march madness interested) readers?! :)

Thursday, March 08, 2012

IWD post this March 8th 2012

From feMOMhist: "The posts in this blog carnival are intended to inspire girls to decide for themselves what they want out of life and to encourage them to believe that they can achieve it."

I'll start with my disclaimer, since it seems to be a lot about balance in life as a parent/mother, and I am not a parent.... but I have a PhD and I am a woman and I have some ideas about the having happiness and pursuing my dreams and hope... so in any event... here goes...

The first time I realised that maybe it wasn't going to be as easy as I thought was when I got told a bit in my graduate studies that "maybe you should consider this research deal. Are you sure you want to become a professor/involved in research". Up until that point I hadn't really given it much thought after my initial decision of scurrying up the TT lane (down the rabbit hole) and "of course I wanted to finish my thesis and then do a post doc". I didn't think too much about it, but went at it and worked on my PhD title. Yeah well... fast forward a bunch of years (now I feel old), got myself a post-doc and later on an "industry" job where I currently reside in. I realise that I most often than not am pretty happy with my present life. Content would be a good word, since I am still trying to get more happiness and balance in there but I'm working on it. And I can look back at my choices and life and feel pretty good about them in hindsight. And most importantly, I'm very happy having the opportunity to talk to young women (girls) since I never had the thought that I couldn't do this and that because I was a girl. Maybe I couldn't do things because of other things, like I'm not a sports pro since I wasn't good at sport... etc... But study wise it never occurred to me that I couldn't do subject X 'because I was a girl' but rather it was a question if I found it interesting or not. Of course, some outer pressure probably didn't help keep me at the math department (previously mentioned here), but I usually think it was more the inability of saying what I could do in the future apart from being a researcher for life in the department, not the "girls can't do math" but... Anyway, I digress.

I've found one important thing to remember, is that you (I) need to know where you are going if you are going to go somewhere. At least have some notion because otherwise it's likely that you start moving in circles and that can be both confusing and disruptive. However, it's important to remember that you might change where you want to go halfway and then you need to take bearing and move in that direction.

I need to remember that every so often since I tend to dig myself into the hole and keep going "since I had decided to go there and I'm not stopping just because it gets hard. I am hard... etc...", i.e. not really thinking about whether or not I want to still keep going that way. (Suggestion one; be OK with changing goals and dreams.)

Of course, since this is 2012 and I currently reside in the United States of America (there is an election year and everyone wants to become president) it would be impossible for me not to mention one of the biggest reasons I am where I am today; access to birth control. Now, I don't say that I am a slut (as in the debate pathetic slugger comment by some radio talk show host), but rather that it made it possible for me to go through undergraduate and graduate studies without becoming pregnant, since I* didn't want to at that time. And that there was a time when this was not a choice for women and among other things firmly divided women into "mothers" or "pursuing their dreams/careers/studies/what have you". There are obviously other factors and the division wasn't always as strong as some people (mainly "people who love the 50ies as described in the media") would have you believe, but it is one of the most potent factors for "liberating women to have more choices and options in what they want their lives to be like and keep pursuing that".

I'm also truly happy that I grew up in  a country where I not only could be dressed in pants when I went to school, nor the mere notion of going to school, getting access to university studies if I so wanted (which I did), play sports, decide whom to marry (as much as anyone can decide these things I guess?), own a business and property, not to mention have control over my own money and numerous of others things, but for today I would like to remember those few key things that make it possible to sort of "have it all" as much as anyone can have it all**

All of these factors (and a bunch of unnamed ones) are the reasons why I have ended up where I am today, and that I have had the opportunity to do them. And I am a woman. And I don't think I'm that remarkable so therefore goes, if I can do it then you can do it (it = 'whatever' you want to do). Make sure though, that you are not alone, seek friends and collegues everywhere, and talk to older women and see if they can't give you some suggestions, inspirations and support. I know that it was immensely important to me. And still is.

The last part of this very long post would be the family part that I mentioned in the disclaimer.

I'm not a mother; that part of my life is not written yet. It might never be written, I don't know. Even if I feel ancient, I know I'm not.... so that is part of the hole digging and taking bearing that I have to do in the future. I have though, some experience in the "sharing life and household" with someone and I would be the first to say that being very conscious about "divisions of chores and work responsibilities" did lead to many a discussion (OK, we can call them arguments) but in the end those are the other key things to help you keep your goals and dreams (i.e. not get caught up and hindered because of someone else's dreams and hopes and you getting redirected into something where you don't want to be). The sharing and giving up some things, the planning and remaking (who really likes cleaning the bath room?) of expectations and everything likes. Communication about what you both want, need and all that jazz inbetween is really key.

If you made it all the way here, thank you. I thought I had a good ending but as usual my thoughts wondered. All in all, there is not anyone who can tell you not to try and pursue what you want. It is up to you if you want to try and pursue your happiness and life, and if you never try; how would you ever now if you would've liked it in the first place. Reality is usually much different from our dreams, but different doesn't have to be bad.

And these "factors" that I talked about, the rights we women now have compared to darker times, some long times ago, some not so long ago. Those rights are precious things that we (obviously) still need to fight for, as in not take for granted or give up pointing out that they are not up for debate anymore. It is something that I occasionally am lulled to sleep about, the 'keep pressure on them', but if nothing else these GOP presidental candidate election debates point out in so harsh light, Nothing is ever sacred from being ripped to shreds (pun intended) and especially not the right to be equal to everyone else. And it is up to us to remember to protect what we have and point out that the world is a safer and better place when women are considered first class people just like men, and men benefit from that too.
I'll stop proselyting now.

* could be exchanged for 'we' since the man in question didn't want to become a father while studying and finishing degrees either. And that might be one of the things I hate mostly about this whole campaign about "no birth control"; men benefit from this too. It's not all about single women going around having loose sex with married men and being Jezebel, it's about married [or monogamous] couples having sex and not having to worry about becoming parents at that specific time of thier marriage/togetherness. I understand that many of these haters don't like "living together without marriage" but I didn't really understand why they hate having nice sex with their partner that much... ah well, side note.

**I'm a firm believer that "career men" who are now in their 50ies/70ies might want to portray that they 'had it all' but when you lo0ok at it the description of 'father' and what many like to say is a 'mother' are so vastly different that it's fairly obvious that they might be 'fathers' but not necessarily 'good, present fathers with a close connection to their children' but since 'mothers' imply 'good mothers who are there for their children' you are indeed setting it all up to fail since then women nowadays (and men for that matter) strive to get something that no one really have gotten before...

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

the only rule that matters in my book... ^^

Simple: If you take the last* of something, let someone know**

* 'last' = not enough to make whatever its needed for most of the time. I.e. leaving 20 mls of liquid A when the most commonly used solution in the lab (and the solution that is used every day) is 100 mls is NOT a good plan

** 'someone know' = tell someone who can order it, email someone who can order it, write it on the board in the lab with one of those pens hanging next to the board under that section where it says "ORDER please"... or you know, fix it yourself.

I had originally thought about writing how wonderful it felt to go to the gym at 6.45 am this morning, and then work out so hard that I was almost puking, then going to work, getting things done and having quite the great day, alas - that just got ruined and I ended up making a little of a scene in the lab fuming over lost solutions and liquids...

Ah well, hopefully ppl who matter agree and ppl who don't agree can... oh I don't know, order the stupid liquid next time instead of trying to feign ignorance and laugh in my face about it. Yes, slightly perturbed, or annoyed or frustrated might be more the term to use..... Lucky for me there is a good evening in front of me and some exercise pain tomorrow! Happy evening to all!!

(let's cross those fingers for the Leafs, right?  Who's the Bruins?!?! ;) )

^^ I guess I have like three two 'rules'; "order/replace stuff when you take the last", "do to others what you want to be done to you" and hmm... probably something like "from each based on their ability to others what they need" or something similar to that; too complex to write in a short rule.... lets leave it at that for now.