The last couple of weeks have been a bit of a "pondering time" for yours truly. Partly unbloggable things, partly things that are right on target to blog about. I've mentioned a few times that I find it interesting (if not down right hard) to re-evaluate your dreams and hopes when what you thought were your dreams turn out not to be the right ones... the TT track is one example. Realizing that you might not be as bad as you sort of thought (hey, never said I was on target with my self assessment) and redefining the goals might be good for you, but it is also hard.
At least if you are anything like me, who doesn't do change that well. Or I guess, in honesty, that I do changes fairly well - it's the uncertainty prior to the decision I am particularly having problems with. The time in limbo, when it is unclear what will happen and what to prepare for.
Anyhow, the last couple of weeks I have received two emails that made my mid boggle a bit. And then there were some things at work that made my mind almost explode. Let's start with the emails, since I have gotten to think about them. They are both similar, not "real job offers" but rather "hey, I remember you and we have an opening at this place and we thought of you and wanted to ask if you wanted to have your CV moved into 'the short track pile into HR with a special recommendation' since you have expertise we need and want". To say my ego feels stroked would be correct.
Main "problem"? That both these jobs are in a very different place than I currently reside. And both of them have been in major US cities with international big corporations/governmental ties, i.e. BIG cities.
For the first one, I wrote a very kind and flattered reply stating that at this time, it's not the right move but very happy you kept me in your thoughts. The second one is the one making things a tad bit more complicated. It would be a nice job (more into my field of expertise as well). Let me rephrase that, it'd be a really interesting and great job on the career ladder... but I am not really interested in moving where it is. Not really, but that could be just a flux right now.
I've mentioned some time ago that my main problem for turning offers down is that I have a problem realizing that there might be new offers around the corner and I don't need to move quickly and take that job right away. Especially since it is not my dream job, although a good one, and I currently have a job that fits my career ladder move/what-have-you.
Of course, unbloggable things make these decisions less clear cut. And making my mind a bit muddled, as in "why I should make the decision" or "base the decision on". I've always been a firm believer in "moving towards" rather than "moving away". It might lead to the same decision in the end, but they are vastly different inside. And I am tired of moving for right now. Or maybe I'm just tired in general?
7 comments:
...I have a problem realizing that there might be new offers around the corner and I don't need to move quickly and take that job right away.
I have the same problem, and I'm really trying to work on it. Otherwise, I end up taking the first thing I'm offered, then hating it. BUT, I feel loyal to the job as well, so pass up opportunities that come around. Not good!
I hope you are able to make the decision based on what's best for you!
hhmm,
sounds hard and I also suck at these things. Some one once told me to look at things in 5, 10, 15 year intervals. As in what will be the effect of this decision in 5 years, 10 years? Am I willing to live with those consequences...
Alyssa> yes, it is my concern that I will "jump on anything since they want me" and not taking the time to see what I want... Granted though, I really don't need to be stressed at this particular time since my job is fairly new and within scope. It's just making me question "what if that job would be awesome" ;)
SM> yes, you see - for me that 5/10/15 year approach isn't really good. I tend to get too stressed lately when I look at it. Not to mention that I have a good idea where I want to be in 20 years, it's the in between years I do't really get ;) AS in "how did I think that's going to happen."
As for consequences, I guess I'm about to move from "it's better to try it than to wonder what it would've been like" towards the opposite. I'm starting to think that maybe that is a better approach. Not failing if you don't try etc... as Homer (simpson) said it.
Hey, if you're getting this kind of email, you're obviously doing something VERY right, and that suggests to me that there will be other similar offers in your future! Nice work!
Is it a place or position you could consider doing for 5 years, or would it lock you in?
Anyway, great you are getting offers, and you certainly know more about the details/unbloggables than I do! :)
Not much advice to offer... but your reasoning and especially your belief in moving *toward* rather than *away* make perfect sense to me. As Cath and other note, it sounds like you will continue to have cool opportunities and offers in the future, and there's no reason to leap on to something just because it's offered. And being tired of moving for the moment? I TOTALLY get that.
Cath: I guess that is one way of looking at it. I like it :) thanks. I think one of it is part of me trying to be a socializing person, the other might be that I did try and schmooze that particular guy (so sure me, playing the game at a conference a while back)
Silver Fox: no, not 5 years in that position.I would probably think it's 3 years or less. more of a "build it up and leave" kind of place. Part of my hesitation, if it was in a place I would think I could feel "for a longer while" then maybe, but now it feels more of a transient position and I am weary of moving there at the moment..
The unbloggable stuff is a bit messy... but one of these days maybe?! ;)
Beanmom: thanks! It is one of those things I have to focus at (on?). That one door opening is not meaning I need to walk through it, I can wait and another (better?) door will open...
as for the moving, having a rough time?!?
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