being a night owl

It's one of those things that you know. If you're a night owl or an early morning riser. Don't get me wrong, I wake up at 6 am most weekday mornings. It doesn't mean that I like it though. Nor that my head is in the game. More often than not I mumble "is it morning again?". And it's not because I haven't slept enough. (There are many times nowadays as old when I am in bed at 10.30pm for a good 7.5 hours of sleep.)

However, when given the choice and opportunity - I stay up late. Like tonight. Sure, I have avoided a few things that I have to do and once completed these, I notice that I feel content and wanting to write something in this blog. I also wrote something smaller in another setting, and I am feeling the happiness filling me.

There is something about being awake in the darkness, in the quiet, in the stillness - that makes me so happy.

I wrote most of my PhD thesis at night as well. Most often I thought it was because I needed quiet so when most people in the department started getting home to their families and kids, around 4pm, then I started gearing up to write. Then when I was a post doc similar pattern appeared. And now, far away from the academic concepts, still I find my writing spot in the dark of night.

I thought it was due to that "if need be I can work through the night and not sleep" in case of a deadline. While that might be a rational thought for me, and one of the underlying reasons, I really think it is more to the fact that my brain isn't really functioning in the morning. Also, I spend a lot of time during the day having my brain thinking through the assignments and sorting through a bunch of thoughts and such, and then when sitting down after 5 pm, it all falls into place and I can easily write it up.

You see, while I wake up at 6 am on the weekdays. I wouldn't say I'm awake until 8am. And that's regardless of coffee or so. I just need a good 60+ mins to wake up and be sociable enough to interact with people. And kick my brain in gear.

One of the reasons I've had my fair share of complainy thoughts of "why does everyone think it is so noble to be at work at 6.30am and leave at 3.30pm?" and also mentioning to my bosses over time that if they want me the most productive, forcing me to be at work 7.30am is not in their best interest. Don't get me wrong, I know I'm privileged to be able to not have to come in at certain early hours every single day.  I'm not taking it for granted. And during my time as a mail person, I did start at 5.45am every single day and didn't complain about it. But then again, it wasn't a problem solving job either...

I am still wondering, when will it be considered "as good as being in at 6.30am" to work a full day (or/and more) and stay until 6pm? Or even, and this is pushing it, not counting the hours of coming in and leaving but focusing on the work that's produced.

I know, I know. It's not the way it is. Just my little dream world. For now though, happy writing in the dead of night. sleep well!